On Friday, August 21, 2026 officers responded to a call about a suspicious unicorn lurking around on Park Ave. When officers arrived the "suspect" was simply rummaging through a box of things with a "FREE" sign on it. Officers found several great items in the box including a carton of orange juice, a bowtie, a breath mint, and a couple of sticks of gum. One officer said, "Wow! How lucky! I've been looking for a carton of orange juice." No crime.
On Tuesday, August 25, 2026 a red panda was bitten on the mouth by a frog on Jacob Miller Road. Both parties agreed that it was a misunderstanding and no charges were filed.
On Friday, August 28, 2026 a man called to report a panicky buck on Fir St. The buck was wearing a nose ring and had a bikini stuck in his antlers. Police arrived and determined the buck had probably wondered into someone's garage and was sniffing around. They were able to help free the buck from his jam. The buck seemed grateful and happily ran off. Later that day, a resident called to report a nose ring and a bikini were stolen from their garage.
On Friday, August 28, 2026 a domestic dispute was reported on Jackson St. Officers arrived and found a brother and sister arguing because the sister told her brother that he "stinks like a smore." He responded by telling her that she "looks like a kind lawyer." The responding officer told the siblings that they should be nicer to each other to which they agreed to try.
On Tuesday, October 31, 2023, Discovery Road, a resident called police to report someone caught on thier doorbell camera, knocking on thier door. It was a little girl dressed as a jazz musician. Police reminded the caller that it was Halloween and the little girl was probably just trick-or-treating. No crime.