"I swear, I was baking Apple-Brown-Betty's"
By: Ralph CarrWashington, D.C. – On Wednesday, Ranking Member of the Senate Judiciary Committee, Dianne Feinstein, questioned Supreme Court Justice nominee Brett Kavanaugh about some of the comments that he had made in his yearbook back in 1983, including references to “boofs”, “devils triangles”, and “ralphing”. After explaining about how his reference to “ralphing” referred to his really good church friend Ralph Van Lotzacash, here is an excerpt of that questioning regarding “Dutch Ovens”:
Feinstein: Your yearbook comment said that you loved to “Dutch Oven girls”. According to the urban dictionary, a “Dutch Oven” means “Farting underneath the blankets while someone is under them with you, thereby trapping them in your noxious, gassy fumes.”
Kavanaugh: Oh Golly Gee, NO! Wow! I’ve never heard of that. I never, ever even came close to doing anything like that, until after I was married! What I meant was that my church friends and I spent our Saturday afternoons baking my grandmother’s famous Apple-Brown-Betty recipe in a Dutch-oven, or cast-iron pot. We would sell them at the church bake sale and the proceeds went to helping send underprivileged girls to church camp.
Feinstein: So you are saying you did participate in this activity?
Kavanaugh (very loud and belligerent now): Have you Dianne??? Huh, have you? Have you ever Dutch Oven-ed anyone? Cuz I’m betting you have, Dianne! I liked Dutch Ovens. I still like Dutch Ovens. Do you like Dutch Ovens, Dianne? Huh? Do you?