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Inquiring Minds Want to Know

I want to know.

By: Helen A. Handbasket
November 17, 2017

Washington, D.C. – What goes on in Washington D.C. often seems like a mystery to those of us who live outside the Beltway. Americans everywhere deserve to have the following questions answered.

  1. How did Jeffrey "I don't recall" Sessions overcome his poor memory and pass the bar exam?
  2. Every morning does Mrs. Jeffrey "I don't recall" Sessions pin a note, to her husband's shirt, that says, "If this man appears lost please return to 61 Memory Lane, Wash. DC"?
  3. Do dictionaries owned by Republicans omit the word "hypocrite"?
  4. Does Mike Flynn ever chant "lock me up"?
  5. Has Donald Trump ever asked Melania if his golf pants make his ass look fat?
  6. What is Mike Pence afraid that he will do if he is alone with a woman who is not his wife?
  7. Does Steve Mnuchin and his wife know that when a camera takes a picture of their arrogant, greedy behavior that other people will probably see it?
  8. Does Jared Kushner ever think about how he will look in an orange jumpsuit?
  9. Does Don Jr. ask for “the American Psycho look” when he goes to the barber for a haircut?
  10. Did Ivanka Trump ever get around to looking up the word “complicit”?

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