Trump grants exclusive interview to Elmo.
By: Jim ShueSesame Street, NY – President Trump took a break today from signing a bunch of unconstitutional, heartless executive orders and paid a visit to Sesame Street. As the president passed by Oscar the Grouch’s house, he tossed a recyclable water bottle into the garbage, hitting Mr. The Grouch on the head. Oscar popped out and said “Hey! That goes in the recycling!” Trump responded, “Not as of this morning. I signed an executive order banning recycling.”
On his next stop, as a promise to Mike Pence, Trump delivered some pamphlets for a “terrific” conversion therapy summer camp to Bert and Ernie.
Next, as a favor to Betsy DeVos, he dropped in on The Count and his daily math lesson with first graders. He told the children that they needed to leave the math lesson and come back when they’ve received their “learning vouchers” from DeVos. He also informed The Count that there would be no more counting cookies, or birds, or bats. From now on, he will be counting Bibles.
And finally, Trump met with Elmo for an exclusive interview. Elmo attempted to find common ground with Trump when he explained, “We have something in common, President Trump. I am a puppet from Sesame Street. You are a puppet from Russia.” Trump responded, “No puppet! No puppet! You’re the puppet!” Then he called Elmo “such a nasty little…. whatever you are.”
Later that day, Trump tweeted, “Very successful visit to Sesame Street today. Another big win!”