Donald Trump’s Favorite Christmas Songs
By: Chris MossMara-a-Lago, FL – Donald Trump has vowed to end the war on Christmas. On Friday, he signed an executive order to require everyone to say “Merry Christmas!” In a speech that the President made in Florida, he said, “Believe me. I love Christmas. You know, that was the day Jesus rose from the grave. Much like Jesus, I have been persecuted, by the ‘fake news’. Well, believe me, we are going to start saying ‘Merry Christmas’ again.” Trump continued to ramble on incoherent thoughts about Jesus, Russia, his crowd size, Crooked Hillary and Christmas.
Trump went on to review his favorite Christmas songs. One of his favorites is “Baby it’s cold outside.” As the man in the song apparently can’t take ‘no’ for an answer and allow the woman to leave, as she wishes to do, Trump explains that he “…loves persistence. People are just trying to criminalize courtship.”
Another favorite of Trump’s “I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus.” Trump says, “Santa Claus is rich and famous. He can do anything. I hope he popped some candy canes first though in case he just starts kissing them.”
And finally, Trump loves “Ding Dong, Merrily on High” because, “Ya’ know, the liberals have made everything so P.C. You can’t even talk about your ding dong anymore.” He went on to make an off-color joke about Roy Moore's favorite Christmas song, "Silent Night". "Keep Roy Moore away from those young virgins. Am I right???"